Dear Son/Gurl,

I am writing dis 2 u in advanced, even b4 meeting ur mother becuz of 1 gr8 reason. I luv u more than u ever do. Strangely, I started 2 feel da love even b4 u were exist rite b4 my eyes. The feeling of protecting u has started b felt in my heart although I av no idea when I cud av thou. People say, love is not meant 2 b seen neither 2 b touched, but it cud still b sensed, even wif sum1 who is yet 2 appear n sum1 who has disappeared before ur eyes.

Partly da reasons being, while da memory is still surfacing n is very dear 2 me, I decided 2 seal it down so dat nothing goes missing n misleading. Ur father has come to many phases in life and relationships – to its ups and downs, been into da light of hope n darkness of despondency, both da beauty of loyalty and the trauma betrayal, been idolated and been disown. Everything! A perfect father certainly I am not, children. But becuz of these various flavours I av tasted in my life (n later 2 experience) perhaps, I have no regret in my life and in getting old.

@ dis age, U must av desired 4 loads of things. To succeed in life (be wif career n studies) including in L.OV.E. but shud dis doesn’t go as in da way u desired it 2 b, feel worry not, as your father always tell himself that indeed, ‘failure is a delayed success.’ So take these advices deep 2 ur heart, av em a thought may you find the world is not ending yet, but has many unexplored rooms of happiness waiting 4 u.

1. U’VE BEEN REJECTED BY THE 2 DAT U LOVED

First, never ever thot dat it is luv dat rejects u. And u shud not put the blame to love, either. Love has nothing 2 do wif it. Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful nor conceded.It is never rude or selfish.It does not take offence It is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people's sins but always delights in the truth. It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope and to endure ... whatever comes. The one dat doesn’t need u is ur ex. So be it!!! Let him/her go! U av given him/her a chance 2 b part in ur life n 4 u 2 be his/hers. But things dun work out. So pack up and leave! Cherish da sweet things s/he has done 2 u. Never hate him/her but u shud thank da person for giving urself both 2 try to work things out 2gether.

Tony McCollum said, “when people walk away from you, let them go. Your destiny is never tied 2 anyone who leaves you, and it doesn’t mean they are bad people. It just means dat their part in ur story is over.”

2. BREAK-UPS HURT

YES, True. I never say it isn’t. No one will even say its easy too. 4 da 1^st time in my life when I was 18, I had my first break-up. N u know dat 1^st love is unforgettable. 4 da 1^st time, I cudnt feel da ground n da world has coming 2 an end n found no reason for living. My views are blurring, spinning around in all directions n I cudnt feel myself standing when dat person muttered those “suicidal” words 2 me. But after my eyes ran out of tears, another part of me was saying “I am still young 2 end my life wif dis stupid thing. I can fall in love again, and mend da broken heart. I can b happy again wif my new love.” N I keep on telling myself – dere’s sum1 (out dere) who is still waiting 4 my love. Its just I haven’t found dat person yet. And dat person is still in foreverly waiting. And God purposely wanted u 2 meet da ‘wrong’ ones 1^st b4 giving u da ‘rite’ one. So u will learn and make it better.

“You can be mad as a mad dog at the way things went; you can swear and curse the fates - but when it comes to the end, you have to let go.” The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

3. YOU CANT FORGET HIM/HER.

Y shud u forget him/her? After all, s/he was once placed @ a very disctinctive space in ur heart. Forgetting sum1 who was once exist is ike believing dat trees do not exist. So, u shudnt! But do not forget, dat ur chapter wif him/her has come 2 an end. Closed. And life is so friggin boring by aving 1 chapter only. We shud try 2 add as many chapters as we can in order 2 get old properly. Indeed, when a story ends, da new one begins. So move on!! Create a new chapter of urs n make sure u write better dis time. Because u already know da rules of da game. Clearly s/he had betrayed ur trust and I see no point of reconciling and begging things to happen as da way it was b4.

When I was 27, I used 2 listen to “Telephone” by Lady Gaga ft Beyonce (they were the world icon back then) Tellin ya, they were hawt n gorgeous in da vc. n dis was wat they discussed in da vc.

“Trust is like a mirror. You can fix if its broken but u can still see da crack in da mother****er reflection.”

4. YOU CANT LIVE WITHOUT HIM/HER

But u can live (so well) b4 meeting him/her. So why judge urself as a wuss n punishing ur life 4 not aving him/her? Look around ya! Ur always stand-by-you parents, supporting sibs (if ur mum is strong enuff to preggie more lah), wonderful frens, above all, The One up there. U av everyone despite of losing sum1. N ur family will always support u. We will b ur wheel 4 u 2 walk, ur wings 4 u 2 fly, ur eyes when u cudnt see, ur cure when u r dying, ur strength when u r losing, n ur shoulder when u burst 2 cry. You ask for it, we’ll give it. Your mum and I will do everything 2 bring u back 2 life. U will never go through dis alone. Not while I’m still breathing.

Paulo Coelho says, “Waiting hurts. Forgetting hurts. But not knowing which decision to take is the worst of suffering.”

5. WHY IS DIS HAPPENING TO YOU?

I dunno. He knows. N we know dat He knows best for every mortal He created. God is giving u a sign son/sweetheart. If only u b able 2 live long, u’ll look back @ dis, n understand. And its better 2 happen now than in da future. Break-up is not bout better late than never, its about da sooner da better. Y? becuz if sumting is not meant 2 be, then it will never be. U can never pretend 2 av sumting if u don’t own it. So Let It Be. @ da time when ur grannies were @ da same age wif me, dere’s a popular song by The Beatles and they sang, “and when the broken hearted people living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be. For though they may be parted there is still a chance that there will be an answer, let it be.”

6. YOU KEEP ON CRYING, HAVING HARD TIME

Go on! Cry babe cry! Let it out n dun keep it inside. Burst all of da burden dat u hold n set ur soul free. Ppl say, in order 2 cure, u’ll av to endure da pain. So dis is it! U must go through da pain b4 u can start everything new. Dun worry, I understand. I truly do! If I av extra penny, I’ll pay 4 ur solo vacation. U got 2 find ur own space n time 2 heal da broken heart! Da time is always urs son/sweetheart! But when u cum back, u will b a stronger, wiser n matured person wif a new spirit (n a new look too!)

7. CAN YOU BE HAPPY IN THE NEXT RELATIONSHIP?

Of course u can. I met ur mum after series of break-ups. And we found you. Although I cant b certain wat will happen next, but I’m sure dat I’ll b happy and strive 2 b happy. Wat ever happens my dear, I will still av n u will still av me. Nothing can change dat.

Frederick Keonig says, “we tend 2 forget happiness doesn’t come as a result of sumting we dun have, but rather of recognising n appreciating wat we do av.”

John Barrymore says, “happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn’t know u left open.”

Your dad says, “Haengbukyoo.” Which translated as Be Happy.

Your Father.

2224 – 21^st September 2010