When my classmates and I were discussing on Freedom and economic growth (in Global Civil Society), I cudnt help but feeling amazed 2 our frens in da Philippines, dat they r happy 2 maintain basic living condition (without rapid development) as long as their freedom is not being touched. Meaning, its OK 4 em (my fren sed, she cud b bias since she’s living in Metro Manila) 2 lead a simple sustainably life without taking away their freedom. Previous Marcos’ and current Arroyo’s style of governing cud serve as examples, she justifies.
While dis discourse was a coincidence 2 my self-deliberation in post-Goong period, nevertheless, it gives me a moment 2 lay back n ponder bout freedom. Those who haven’t seen (n I encourage u 2 do dat) Goong is a Korean series, of a triangle relationship between a princess and 2 princes. Although its still a stereotype being a Korean drama – dat triangle relationship, parents interference, n da 1st hero will always get his luv (no matter how nasty he behaved @ 1st) must conventionally exist, da point I reflected da most from dis movie is F.R.E.E.D.O.M. Lee Goon, da Crown Prince was forced 2 marry a commoner Chae Gyung, after been rejected by his gf. Throughout their marriage (though it never consummated) luv starts 2 blossom between these 2 souls (a prince and once a commoner). However many things they cudnt do/cherish juz becuz they belonged 2 da Royal Family n subjected 2 da old-fashioned (kuno) Royal laws. Their freedom to live as a happy loving couple is restrained due 2 their position n situation.
I must say, although I dun belong 2 any Royals or rich families alike, I can feel how does it being living under da commands of da elders in da family. Living wif parents who are rigid n religiously conservatived, makes me no difference than Shin Goon and Chae Gyung. Da only difference spot exist between my reality n theirs (as far as da drama is concerned), they r bond by traditional royal laws upheld by the palace while I am imposed wif a strict Islamic observation and practices by my parents. They have no means 2 say, 2 object, 2 express wat they want, 2 live life according 2 self-determination, n so do I.
And dat makes us miserable, turning our lives into extreme despair and despondency.
N dis has turned me into a (pro) freedom fighter; taking every chance it has 2 make me being free n independence. Even as 2 being regarded as da ‘black sheep’ of da family 4 being persistently resisting me parents, I av no other options but 2 believe in my freedom. It is never in my intention (honestly) 2 go against me parents, wat more 2 make em upset n disappointed, but it seems I av no other means 2 believe in wat I want, 2 get wat I wished 4. After all, dis is 4 me n my life n I dun want it 2 b determined n fixed by someone else.
It is subjective 2 quantify da price of being free. Da rooms 2 make decisions, da avenues 2 stick wif it n 2 execute it r simply priceless n cant be valued materially. Call me a Western individualistic who abandons communitarian values, or a modern urbanised selfish lad, but dis is da only territory dat I av 4 a living. @ da age of 27, I want my life 2 b determined by my own will, my aims 2 b desired by my own dreams, without taking orders from da others. Dats y, I believe, God gives u (each and everyone of us) a mind 2 think, a heart 2 feel so dat u may stand wif ur own feet, n sail ur life independently.
But dis is not understood by my beloved parents.
As I’ve endlessly been trying 2 explain 2 em, my effort met nothing but series of failures. N I cudnt do dis anymore. I’ve reached 2 a point dat, diplomacy fails 2 work n dat my patience is never be considered, yet, my self-belief must b pursued wif a strong determination, otherwise I’ll be trapped in dis dilemma 4eva. Sorry mum, Sorry dad. If I dun do dis 4 myself, I’ll b in forever regretting, blaming u n me for not wanting a change. N I dun want 2 do dat. I dun want 2 regard u as bad parents 4 disapproving my choice in life, neither I dun want 2 feel sorry in da end, growing up in a conservative old-fashioned family in which I had no chance 2 stand on my own, moving into my direction. After considering n hardly reflecting, I think dis is da best 4 u n me, although I know u will no longer support me n stand by me.
Da choice I’ve made is not easy, neither leading me 2 an easy life. Without you being my backbone, I feel half of my life is perished. Hollow. Im fully aware dat, without ur blessings n support, God will turn away from me. But as long as my love 2 u will never dilute, I know He will not punish me severely. And its becoz I luv u, (n I dun want 2 blame u), Im taking dis path, so dat I can appreciate da life u av given 2 me 27 years ago.
I pray n I hope dat 1 day U’ll understand me – as ur son who always want 2 b free. I’ll pray dat U’ll feel da pain 4 living under ur rulings, da misery 4 following ur dreams. Above all, I want u 2 know, my luv 4 u will always remain, n as 4 dat reason, I am taking dis chance 2 pursue my dreams.
Im juz an ordinary human who wishes 2 lead an ordinary n free life. I av nothing more 2 ask 4, but giving me my life n my freedom. Those r mine, n never can b others. Hence Im merely taking wat is mine n protecting/defending it (@ wat price it costs me). Still I am ur loving son n 4ever be. But 2 luv me 4 da ‘niu’ me, 2 accept me 4 wat I am n wat I believe in, its entirely up 2 u. In da end, I thank u 4 giving birth 2 me (n dere’s nothing in dis world or even in my next life I cud give 2 substitute wat U’ve given me) but,
I JUST WANT 2 BE BORN FREE !!!
ZI
While dis discourse was a coincidence 2 my self-deliberation in post-Goong period, nevertheless, it gives me a moment 2 lay back n ponder bout freedom. Those who haven’t seen (n I encourage u 2 do dat) Goong is a Korean series, of a triangle relationship between a princess and 2 princes. Although its still a stereotype being a Korean drama – dat triangle relationship, parents interference, n da 1st hero will always get his luv (no matter how nasty he behaved @ 1st) must conventionally exist, da point I reflected da most from dis movie is F.R.E.E.D.O.M. Lee Goon, da Crown Prince was forced 2 marry a commoner Chae Gyung, after been rejected by his gf. Throughout their marriage (though it never consummated) luv starts 2 blossom between these 2 souls (a prince and once a commoner). However many things they cudnt do/cherish juz becuz they belonged 2 da Royal Family n subjected 2 da old-fashioned (kuno) Royal laws. Their freedom to live as a happy loving couple is restrained due 2 their position n situation.
I must say, although I dun belong 2 any Royals or rich families alike, I can feel how does it being living under da commands of da elders in da family. Living wif parents who are rigid n religiously conservatived, makes me no difference than Shin Goon and Chae Gyung. Da only difference spot exist between my reality n theirs (as far as da drama is concerned), they r bond by traditional royal laws upheld by the palace while I am imposed wif a strict Islamic observation and practices by my parents. They have no means 2 say, 2 object, 2 express wat they want, 2 live life according 2 self-determination, n so do I.
And dat makes us miserable, turning our lives into extreme despair and despondency.
N dis has turned me into a (pro) freedom fighter; taking every chance it has 2 make me being free n independence. Even as 2 being regarded as da ‘black sheep’ of da family 4 being persistently resisting me parents, I av no other options but 2 believe in my freedom. It is never in my intention (honestly) 2 go against me parents, wat more 2 make em upset n disappointed, but it seems I av no other means 2 believe in wat I want, 2 get wat I wished 4. After all, dis is 4 me n my life n I dun want it 2 b determined n fixed by someone else.
It is subjective 2 quantify da price of being free. Da rooms 2 make decisions, da avenues 2 stick wif it n 2 execute it r simply priceless n cant be valued materially. Call me a Western individualistic who abandons communitarian values, or a modern urbanised selfish lad, but dis is da only territory dat I av 4 a living. @ da age of 27, I want my life 2 b determined by my own will, my aims 2 b desired by my own dreams, without taking orders from da others. Dats y, I believe, God gives u (each and everyone of us) a mind 2 think, a heart 2 feel so dat u may stand wif ur own feet, n sail ur life independently.
But dis is not understood by my beloved parents.
As I’ve endlessly been trying 2 explain 2 em, my effort met nothing but series of failures. N I cudnt do dis anymore. I’ve reached 2 a point dat, diplomacy fails 2 work n dat my patience is never be considered, yet, my self-belief must b pursued wif a strong determination, otherwise I’ll be trapped in dis dilemma 4eva. Sorry mum, Sorry dad. If I dun do dis 4 myself, I’ll b in forever regretting, blaming u n me for not wanting a change. N I dun want 2 do dat. I dun want 2 regard u as bad parents 4 disapproving my choice in life, neither I dun want 2 feel sorry in da end, growing up in a conservative old-fashioned family in which I had no chance 2 stand on my own, moving into my direction. After considering n hardly reflecting, I think dis is da best 4 u n me, although I know u will no longer support me n stand by me.
Da choice I’ve made is not easy, neither leading me 2 an easy life. Without you being my backbone, I feel half of my life is perished. Hollow. Im fully aware dat, without ur blessings n support, God will turn away from me. But as long as my love 2 u will never dilute, I know He will not punish me severely. And its becoz I luv u, (n I dun want 2 blame u), Im taking dis path, so dat I can appreciate da life u av given 2 me 27 years ago.
I pray n I hope dat 1 day U’ll understand me – as ur son who always want 2 b free. I’ll pray dat U’ll feel da pain 4 living under ur rulings, da misery 4 following ur dreams. Above all, I want u 2 know, my luv 4 u will always remain, n as 4 dat reason, I am taking dis chance 2 pursue my dreams.
Im juz an ordinary human who wishes 2 lead an ordinary n free life. I av nothing more 2 ask 4, but giving me my life n my freedom. Those r mine, n never can b others. Hence Im merely taking wat is mine n protecting/defending it (@ wat price it costs me). Still I am ur loving son n 4ever be. But 2 luv me 4 da ‘niu’ me, 2 accept me 4 wat I am n wat I believe in, its entirely up 2 u. In da end, I thank u 4 giving birth 2 me (n dere’s nothing in dis world or even in my next life I cud give 2 substitute wat U’ve given me) but,
I JUST WANT 2 BE BORN FREE !!!
ZI
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